hey everyone i get to be back after a long fun summer with problems

i kinda accidently fell in love wid one of my best mates while she really likes my other best mate slash band member i dont know what to do i want her to be happy

so i guess i should let her go and move on i dont know any ideas

well ill be back on later if ne1 does maybe ill post some art or blog potrey

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my special spot in my entire world is the ledge above my front door i can sit out there and think

when im out there i am always looking for a star her star

so all though i hate being alone that spot gets me tthrough a lot of tough times

so i wrote this reall crappy poem thing about it

i loath thew lonelyness

i feel in my heart

i sit there looking out on the stars thinking looking for your star

the thought cross my mind am i destined to e alone constantly lookin up

for your star

as i sit there tonight i see no stars does that mean you have finnaly forgoten me

finally forgoten how i was unable to stop you from leaaving me

i will always look up for your star so i will never forget you

that poem i came up with in my spot i dedicate it to who i belive to be my love even though she doesnt feel the same way any more

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i started to write a song

its called father like son

its a about how i am determind not to turn out

like my dad

how i start to think i can be diffrent

but later i learn its pointless

nd how i'd rather die than be him

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as you can tell frm the title i am still waiting but the question is for wot well i gess thts Why? ur reading this blog

well late ly i wrote a song called a lingering dream but after that i was still waiting for my angel to awnser on what she tought of my song

and its killing me insde not knowing what she things its literaly sucking my life away

i havnt been able to sleep nd my head is full of wot if she dont like it

i had to write a peice of corsework to day i got six pages of the same sentence wot if she does not like it and never tlks to me

i dont no if i will live much long because of this in some sence my life has already ended

i cnt think eat or sleep so i am think now Why? did i show her this, have i lost all will to live should i just take my life or should i just try kill the pain bydrawing or writeing another song

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if love is scuicde death, is upon on us all at some time

but when your in love it feels like your about to fly

but when they break your heart you realise you spiraling it too death

we are all vulnerable

but some have felt love at a young age

so there destined to die alone

and others dont love at all while some may love them

we all are going to die at some point.

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i was thinking of my new gf but two

days after she texts me sayin she their

is nothing even in that short time i lose

my self once again to the pain of death no

one understands i will probably wake

at the doctors a few days after the attempt

in the icu for massive blood loss

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wots the point in living

we all r gonna die ne wayz

so people say live ur life to the fullest

they say that to the people who have no life

those who belive wil live it to the fullest and become sucessful in life

but no one ever belived in me exsept when i was about to die nd the 

god of no one saved me for that it distroyed my faith

he took my close friend nd left me 

with the last words of his voice still ecoing in my head

i live on for one reason to look after my family

not coz i want to  coz i promised my gradfather as he died in

front of me 

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