Please don't read if you are against gays, bis, and lesbians. I don't want you to feel offended or disgusted or what not.


What's wrong with me!? I was reading some past texts me and my best friend had sent to each other and most of it contained us role playing as Ezio and Leonardo. Me being Leonardo of course. :3 Any way... Well, when we role play we tend to throw in some flirty heart felt words into some of the texts. Well, I've already told her this that my heart flutters when I read them and she told me that her heart does too. Well... I've never really thought about like... Really liking her in a way passed friendship. We've been really close friend for about two years now. I mean, she's the best thing that's ever happened to me. She's a great person and I miss her a lot. (She moved awhile ago. I'll see her next year though when I move there.)

Well, a couple of nights ago I was thinking about what if we had a relationship. I totally waved it away. I had a talk with her already about her sexuality. She said that she was sort of bi curious, but wasn't jumping on the bandwagon. She even told me that if she ever did that she would ask me out first. I was really flattered that she said that, but again I waved the idea away. I really look at her as a person who will marry a man some day and yadda yadda.

I've been, myself going out on dates with other people, but I find myself comparing them to her. Which is weird trying to compare a guy to a girl... But, I'm afraid that is the reason why I keep pushing the guys away that I date is because I have some sort of mindset that I'm with my friend. I know I shouldn't. But... I don't know it's weird... I might be over thinking this, but it's been on my mind lately... 

I really hope this whole thing goes away though... When I move, I'm moving in with her and I'm afraid that I'll blurt out how I'm feeling and it'll just make things awkward. Or maybe I could play it off and say I was joking. I mean we jokingly flirt all the time, so I guess she'd just laugh.

... You know... My situation would be such a good fanfic! I'll defiantly have to write one out at some point!

So, yeah... I guess I just wanted to write this out and organize my thoughts a little... Yup...

Topics: heart, flutter, friend
dragon_kitty787
....we'll give you sometime to think about it...LOL
  • June 10, 2011
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CandyNights
Quote:Originally posted by: dragon_kitty787....we'll give you sometime to think about it...LOL Haha thanks. X3
  • June 10, 2011
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CandyNights
Quote:Originally posted by: Zorishithta's really sweet. well, if you truely do feel this way, then just go for it!!! Maybe it will be blossoming relationship No matter how things turn out always look to the positive side of things. ^^ Good Luck!
Thank you! But, I'm going to wait to maybe tell you ...
  • June 10, 2011
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